


Goodnight Moon

by calcum



Category: One Direction
Genre: AU, F/M, Harry is depressed, Harry is in love, Kinda, Not really though, One Shot, indication of selfharm, it's pretty much mostly fluff, louis is mentioned like twice, mentions death, this is pretty cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-07
Updated: 2014-10-07
Packaged: 2018-02-20 07:49:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2420834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calcum/pseuds/calcum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Her name is Emmy and she reminds him of the sun.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodnight Moon

**Author's Note:**

> okay so this is dedicated to a good friend of mine, emmy.

He wakes up at six a.m. Monday morning and wonders why his mother decided to plan a breakfast this early for just the two of them. His eyes look up at the sunlight dancing across the yellow ceiling. Laying on bed, not yet fully awake, he realizes he hates the color yellow.

Sighing deeply, he sits on the edge of his bed thinking about the faster he gets ready and picks up his mother, the faster he can come back home to his apartment and waste away alone. He sighs deeply again and fully stands up to glance up the the annoyingly yellow ceiling and scowls at it. He walks across his room to the corner that is sort of a hamper until the clothes that actually fit in his closet end up on the floor. From there he picks the clothes with the least noticeable stains and sprays more cologne than he normally would.

From the pile, he picks up black skinny jeans he wears too often and a gray tee-shirt with some band he doesn't listen to anymore. He rubs the sleep in his eyes away with the balls of his hands. He sighs and refuses to look in the bedroom mirror as he walks out of the room. 

+-+

As he brushes his teeth, his eyes are cast downwards at the water going down the drain. His own life is like the water; going down the drain. 

+-+

He realizes he forgot to put socks on as he looks down at his worn-out black Vans. He then realizes he doesn't care and proceeds the struggle to put on the one-size-too-small shoes on his unnaturally large and sweaty feet. 

+-+

When he enters the lobby, he walks past a group of old ladies who watch him with disdain. As he walks away, he wonders if a group of old ladies have, like, a scientific name like a school of fish or a pack of wolves. 

+-+

He checks Google as he enters the cool parking garage. Google does not provide a strong, supported answer. He sighs for what feels like the hundredth time today. 

+-+

Between a silver mini-van and a red sports car is his truck. It's black with multiple white scratches all on the exterior that remind him of his own white scars on his body. The rims are rusting away and the front right tire is missing two lug-nuts. The interior of his truck has wrappers and takeout containers spread all on the floor and in the passenger seat. It reminds him he needs to clean his truck out. But he won't. So he just throws the Coke can to the back seat where it'll stay until he decides to sell his truck.

+-+

The parking garage is hectic and he has seven murderous and suicidal thoughts before he finally manages to pull out of the underground garage. He wonders why the traffic is so bad when he realizes it's a Monday morning at six-thirty and everyone has to go to work. Not everyone is living off the will of their dead father like he is. 

+-+

He sighs as the light turns red. He sighs once again as the light turns green but he misses it because people are being assholes and are paying more attention to their phones than the road. 

+-+

When he pulls into his mother's driveway, she is sitting on the swing on her porch reading a magazine. She looks up when he slams his car door. Her face is tired and her hair is more gray than it is brown, but her tired face lights up in a smile and she looks young again. 

"You're late." She says, walking towards him with the soft smile he grew up with on her pink lips. When she finally reaches him, she wraps her arms around his neck in hug. He has to bend down a lot to be able to give her a kiss on the cheek.

He looks down at his watch: 7:08. "At least I came at all." His own pink lips, that everyone says are identical to his mother's, were turned up in a playful smirk which caused his mother to roll her eyes.

"We're taking my car," she says, walking to the new white care and getting into the drivers seat, "I'm driving."

+-+

He sits in silence as his mother talks about everything. Occasionally, he nods or smiles when he hears her laugh and now mother isn't catching on. She just continues rambling to her herself to fill the tense silence that has filled the car. 

+-+

She shakes his shoulder and has a concerned expression upon her face as he wakes up. His heart swells at the fact that his mother, who's been so blind for so long, finally caught on. "How much sleep did you get last night, Harry?" He sighs and looks out the windshield to see a place that is not Eddy's.

"Where are we?" He asks, glancing at his mother who has her lips pursed tightly together, probably because he ignored her question. 

"Café Fleur. I thought we could go somewhere new. I've heard some great reviews of this place. Jackie came here last week said the service was great and the food was excellent."

His brows scrunch together, "This name of this place translates to Café Flower."

"Oh that's cute."

+-+

Café Fleur is very bright and colorful. The orange walls hurt his eyes and there are so many mirrors on the walls that he catches sight of the white, jagged scar cutting through his left cheek multiple times. He sighs and sits across from his mother in the plushy green booth. It's already obvious that he's not going to enjoy this place even if they do have good food. 

+-+

Their waitress is really small and looks fifteen. Her bright yellow shirt and the crown of yellow flowers placed delicately upon the fluff her lilac hair causes him to squint and not be able to look directly at her for long amounts of time. She's almost as bright as the restaurant itself.

+-+

Her name is Emmy and she reminds him of the sun.

She has braces and she smiles a lot and she seems like just a happy person. Her hair is cut really short and her name tag is written in really swirly handwriting that he traces with his eyes whenever she comes over to ask for their orders or to refill their drinks. Emmy acts just like Gemma when they were younger and he's amused this go-happy, colorful-haired girl. 

+-+

When she comes back with his and his mothers food, he watches the way her pink lips move when she talks and how her eyes are a dull blue that are kind of like the ocean on a somewhat cloudy day. She leans over and places his plate in front of him and he can smell her perfume. Emmy smells, ironically, like flowers and he wonders if they named the café after her scent.

Probably not.

+-+

Emmy brings them the check along with four of those chocolate mints that she says are her favorite. His mother complements Emmy on the color and style of her hair and Emmy blushes deeply. 

"Thank you so much. My boss had a fit and almost fired me on the spot until his wife calmed him down and explained to my boss that my hair was cute and looks great with the whole theme of the restaurant."

"I love it." He smiles fully at her and rests his chin on his hand and openly stared at just her face, "It suits you perfectly, Emmy."

She blushes so deeply that it's enough to turn the tips of her ears bright red. 

+-+

As he and his mother leave, Emmy calls out a 'have a nice day' and he turns and should a 'you too' back at her with a wink. 

+-+

The car ride is silent and he thinks of Emmy the whole time. He glances at his mother from time to time and she always has a soft smile on her face. He decides not to question it.

+-+

He says goodbye to his mother and declines the invitation to stay a bit longer to see his sister, Gemma. Leaning down again, he kisses her cheek before getting in his dying truck and driving home. 

+-+

Traffic has cleared up considering it's 9:43 and everyone's still at work. 

+-+

When he parks his truck, the silver minivan and red sports car are gone. And in the lobby, the old ladies are still sitting around and they glare at him as he walks past. They probably don't like how black and skinny his jeans are or how he's not at work. 

He, in turn, gives them a big smile and a 'hello ladies' as he enters the elevators. They don't understand.

+-+

When he gets inside his apartment, he takes off his shoes and searches underneath his couch he bought for $10 at a garage sale, for socks. He ends up wearing a blue sock with a hole for the big toe on his right foot and a gray sock that goes up to his mid-shin on his left. 

It isn't much improvement, but it's improvement.

+-+

He ends up in his bedroom, laying on his bed staring at the yellow ceiling. It reminds him of her and she reminds him of the sun. The sun reminds him of better days.

Happier days.  
+-+

After staring at the yellow ceiling fro a while, he finally stands up and walks to the bathroom.

He stands in front of the mirror and looks at himself. His eyes go directly to the white scar on his left cheek that starts at the top of his cheek bone and stops at his jaw, close to his chin. He sighs and looks at his chapped pink lips and his green eyes and his overly-long pile of brown hair. He walks out of the bathroom feeling worse, a lot worse about himself.

+-+

The next week, he decides he's going to 'Cafe Fleur' alone.

He tells himself it's because they have the best omelet he's ever tasted, but he isn't fooling himself, he's going back to see Emmy.

So he looks up 'Cafe Fleur' on Google Maps (he is much too proud to ask him mother for directions) and he puts on his brown boots and rushes out the door.

+-+

The old ladies in the lobby are replaced by a group of children who gawk at the tattoos up his arms and the scar on his cheek. He looks over and smiles at their faces of embarrassment of being caught staring.

Children make him laugh.

+-+

It is 8:48 when he parks in front of 'Cafe Fleur' and his hands, very much clammy, are slightly shaking. He takes a deep breath and runs both hands through his brown hair out of nervousness.

He could do this.

No he couldn't.

Yes.

No. But he has to do it, he isn't going to waste this much gas just to drive back home and not even get a bite to eat.

+-+

He walks inside to see the walls are still orange and the booths are still green and that all of this color, completely contrasting his dark clothing again, annoys him greatly.

Taking a seat in the same green booth, he picks up a menu already laid out but he doesn't really read it. He's too busy looking over the top of it spying out the door leading to the kitchen, waiting for Emmy to come out and serve him.

+-+

Emmy doesn't come. Instead, it's a man, who calls himself Louis, wearing a yellow shirt. Yellow looks annoying on Louis and he has to turn away from his waiter. Louis has a high-pitched voice and uses his hands greatly when he talks and everything about Louis annoys him and he wants to leave, wants to escape. But he won't, he's already here and should at least get something.

 

+-+

He orders a coffee (he doesn't even know if he likes coffee) and Louis brings it out to him on a silver platter with cream and sugar in little cups.

+-+

"Would you like anything else, sir?"

"No."

"Breakfast is the most important meal of the day! Are you sure you don't want anything?"

"Yes."

"…Wait do you want food?"

"No."

+-+

He realizes he hates coffee. A lot.

+-+

As he's leaving, Louis stops him at the door, "Hey man, were you waiting for someone?"

"…Yeah. Yeah I was."

"I'm sorry they didn't show up."

"Yeah," He looks over Louis's head to see the empty front counter, "Me too."

+-+

It's 10:56 when he walks into his apartment. He sighs and forgets to take off his shoes as he pushes his dirty underwear on his couch onto the floor. Plopping down onto the worn couch, he takes his crappy phone out of his back pocket and opens Facebook. He goes into the search bar and types in 'Emmy'. Unsurprisingly, he can't find her purple hair in the list.

He is disappointed and admits to himself he probably likes this girl Emmy.

Probably.

+-+

The clock drags onto 3:33 and a Cake Boss re-run is playing. He isn't hungry, so he starts his Cake Boss marathon.

 

+-+

It's 5:27 and the last Cake Boss just aired. My Strange Addiction is next.

He is still not hungry.

+-+

At 7:38, he has seen too many screwed up lives better in a thirty minute episodes and he has hope that he can get better too.

+-+

Standing in front of the bathroom mirror, again, he looks at himself as his index finger traces the scar on his left cheek. He realizes he can't get better.

He doesn't want to get better.

+-+

His mother is really worried and she calls him a lot but he doesn't pick up. He's twenty-years-old and has simply stopped caring about everything. Why can't she get that and just leave him alone to do whatever the hell he wants to do.

+-+

"Honey? Hey, it's mom, again. I'm getting really worried so could you call me, or Gemma, when you get this? I love you dear."

"It's been a day since my last call, and I promised myself that I would try not to baby you, but I still have no idea how you are, where you are, or what you're doing. Gemma says she hasn't heard from you either. Do you want to get breakfast next Thursday? You could pick the place this time, wherever you want to go and we'll go. Please call me back, Harry, love you."

"If you do not call me back, I will break into your apartment to see if you're alright. Do not test me son."

+-+

He leaves a note on the counter for his mother to read if she does decide to break into his apartment. He drives the 35 minute drive on Wednesday morning to 'Cafe Fleur' to avoid his mother and all her questions and too see if he could, maybe, run into Emmy.

+-+

Louis is standing behind the counter besides Emmy, who's hair is now red but still has the ridiculous yellow flower crown placed delicately upon the red fluff. Both Louis and Emmy are wearing the yellow shirts and he can't stand to look at the pair at the same time for long periods of time. It's like looking at two suns.

When the pair look up at him, Louis straightens out, "Hey man, you talk to that girl again? The one that stood you up?"

He keeps flickering his eyes over to Emmy, who's absentmindedly cleaning a glass, "Uh, no. I haven't talked to her since we made plans to meet here Monday. I don't think she's interested." This causes Emmy too snap out of her day dream and stare at him. 

Louis laughs and motions for a seat in front of the counter, "Sit, I'll get you something to drink… and eat if you're going to eat this time."

Smiling, he takes a seat on the stool and places his elbows on the counter, "Yeah, can I get a glass of orange juice and an omelet?"

"Emmy can get you that, can't you?" He and Louis look over at Emmy, who's nodding her head and disappears into the kitchen, "My shift is over, so Emmy will take care of you." As Louis walks past him, he pats Harry on the back and whispers, "Make plans with her right now. She likes you too." He turns and looks stunned at Louis, but he only laughs and walks out of 'Cafe Fleur.' 

+-+

He sits there for a while, just in silence, playing on his phone and deleting the seven missed calls from his mother and three from his sister without even listening to them. He doesn't understand why he's so upset because ever since his dad died, he's wanted his mom to realize that he wasn't okay and needed help, and now that she has caught on, he wants her to become oblivious again. Frowning, he realizes how selfish he is and doesn't understand why he is here, at 'Cafe Fleur' because in the case of some miracle, he would find the guts to ask Emmy on a date or something, he would only just be dragging her into a deep, dark abyss that she would never be able to get out of. He doesn't want to do that to her but it seems she's the only light he's had in a while. 

+-+

He doesn't have much time to think about what he's going to do, because Emmy comes out from the kitchen carrying a glass of orange juice and a plate with his omelet on it. When she sets it down, he smiles in thanks before taking a small sip of his orange juice.

"So, tell me about this girl that stood you up." Emmy says, leaning on the counter right in front of him, "I-I mean only if you want to. You don't have to tell me anything, it's just I thought maybe I could help."

He chuckles and swallows the bit of omelet he put into his mouth, "It's fine. There isn't much to tell at all. We met just out of nowhere, and at first I thought she was quite annoying because she was quite happy and bubbly. And I really wanted to ask her out on a date, but she beat me to it and we made plans to met here Monday and I showed but she wasn't here. Since then I haven't talked to her." 

Emmy smiles at him softly, like she knows he's talking about her, "Harry, right?" He nods quickly, "Harry, would you like to go get a drink with me sometime?"

He doesn't think he's ever smiled so big in his life.

+-+

Their first date is that Friday and he's nervous and has butterflies in his stomach and his mother can't stop smiling as she helps him get ready. He wears black jeans and a white, loose button up shirt with his brown boots. Before he leaves, he hugs his mother tightly and whispers "thank you" in her ear and she can't stop crying as he closes his apartment door behind him.

He drives in his scratched, beat up truck for fifteen miles out of his way to pick Emmy up from her apartment complex. Willow Heights, the run-down, beat up, apartment complex Emmy lives in is on the edge of town in the center of the bad neighborhoods and she's sitting on the curb wearing blue jeans and a sweater. She stands up and gets into the passenger seat, "Hey." She whispers as he drives.

"Hey," Harry looks over at Emmy to see she isn't wearing the yellow flower crown, "This is the first time I've seen you without that flower crown in your hair. You look great either way."

She laughs and pats her head, "Thanks, and this is the first time I've seen you not wearing all black."

They both laugh together and he can't help but notice how perfectly their laughs harmonize together. How perfect she is.

The car ride is just of mindless chatter about anything and everything and this time he actually contributes to the conversation. He exits off the express way, and into the downtown city, he looks over at Emmy when he's stopped at a red light, "So I was thinking we could go see a movie or go see an outdoor concert. It's up to you what you want to do."

She smiles widely at him, "Let's go see the concert."

At the concert they sway to the music and lay underneath a tree and just talk and laugh and this is the first time they hold hands. Her hands are small and soft and his calloused thumb strokes her knuckles. He thinks he's in love with her. 

Maybe.

+-+

For their second date, that Sunday, he invites her over to his flat and they sit on his beat up couch and watch stupid comedy movies all night and she never stops laughing and he loves it. Emmy ends up falling asleep on his shoulder and he doesn't have the heart to wake up so he can adjust his position to something more comfortable. So he just leans his head back and closes his eyes basking himself in the sound of her breathing and how she still smells strongly of flowers. He's fallen in love with the way she does everything.

+-+

She goes out of town for two weeks, so he breaks into her apartment and lights candles and has his mother cook a pot of spaghetti and he makes her small kitchen table a really fancy table for two. He wears his best suit and sits facing the door for fifteen minutes just twiddling his thumbs extremely nervous about seeing her again. 

When Emmy walks in, her face is full of shock and she then starts crying and hugs him as tight as she can. He wants to hold her in his arms forever.

+-+

For their fourth date, he takes Emmy to his mothers house to meet his mother (again) and his sister Gemma. "I think you'll get along great with Gemma, and my mom already loves you, so you have nothing to be worried about."

"Harry," She laughs, "I'm not worried. I think you're more worried than anything else."

He smiles sheepishly at her and shrugs his shoulders and he pulls into his mother's driveway. His mother quickly embraces Emmy when she walks in, "It's so nice to see you again, oh and I love the red in your hair. You look gorgeous." Emmy laughs and begins talking to his mother as they walk into the kitchen. Harry's still standing by the door watching them disappear before Gemma walks up to him.

"She's got you've tied around your finger. I don't think I've seen you this happy since dad." Her hair is blonde now and she's still majorly shorter than him.

He smiles and brings her into a hug, "Because I haven't been fully happy since dad."

Gemma looks up at him, and her finger traces his scar and he flinches but lets her trace it, "I'm glad she makes you feel this way." She fully steps away from him and she smiles up brightly at his face, "Now let's go meet her and save her from mom."

+-+

"What are we?" Emmy asks on their fifth date, "I mean, like are we a couple or are we what?"

Harry looks up from his phone and watches her twiddle with his shirt that goes down to her thighs, "I would like to think that we're a couple."

"Its just you've never asked me." Her eyes are worried as she stares him down.

He blinks at her, "Oh." For a few moments they just stare at each other in silence before Harry gets off from the couch and grabs Emmy's hands in his. "Emmy, you are the most beautiful thing I have ever laid my eyes on and you've saved my life. You've given me a reason to live and enjoy it, not just go through the motions. I have someone to take care of now, I have you. You're all I care about and I don't want to let you go. So will you please be my girlfriend?"

Her ocean blue eyes watered with tears as she wrapped her arms around his neck and nodded into his neck, "Yes. You are beautiful, Harry. You are beautiful."

That night was the best love he had ever had.

+-+

The morning after, they lay beneath his sheets and his head was laying on her chest and her small fingers were stroking his scalp. "Are you up?"

"Yeah," He yawned opening his eyes and kissing her collarbone. "You should move in."

"What?"

"I mean," He said, "You're over here all the time and it's closer to your job so you'll be saving gas and you'd be saving a lot of money."

"Okay," Emmy said kissing his hair, "You're going to help me clean out my apartment though."

+-+

Two weeks after moving in, she asked about the scar on his face and he froze in shock and didn't say anything for a few minutes. She shakily traced it down his face and he didn't flinch away from her fingers like he had done with Gemma. "I was eleven and I threw up at school and the nurse called my dad to come pick me up because my mom was at work. But my dad worked three jobs, two at night and one during the day, and during school hours was the only time he was off or got sleep, so he was dead tired when he came and picked me up. So he like fell asleep as we were driving back home and we got hit by a truck and he was killed on impact and a piece of metal cut my face."

Emmy didn't say anything, just traced the scar up and down with her finger. When he looked over at her, she had tears streaming down her face and he pulled her into a hug, "You don't blame yourself, do you Harry?"

"I did. For a while actually. But I finally realized that it's okay. Regretting it isn't going to bring him back so I've moved on."

"I love you, Harry."

"I love you too."

+-+

"Why is your ceiling yellow?" She asks, nuzzling into his neck even more. Harry looks away from her face to glance up at the yellow ceiling, "Like why not white or a normal ceiling color. Your walls are white, should the ceiling be white too? Not yellow?"

He smiles and looks back down at her face. She has her tongue poking out between her pink lips and her eyes are squinted as she stares at the bare ceiling. She's beautiful.

"I don't know why," he whispers, laying his head on top of her fading red hair, "But I like it and it's just a ceiling. You only see it if you look up. You only see the light if you look for it."

"Yeah," she smiles, grasping his large hand between her own, "You only see it if you look for it."

Laying there, barely awake, he realizes the color yellow isn't so bad after all.


End file.
